Mid-twenties and already beaten down and hopeless, Selraybob spends his days on his worn out lounger, drinking quarts of Busch and talking to his buddy Herm on the phone. Productivity is a forgotten dream. Until, right in the middle of his wife’s long-overdue goodbye speech, Selraybob has an epiphany. It’s about Time. Time, he determines, is a count. It's only a count. Einstein was wrong. And life on the lounger will never be the same.

Acknowledgements

Dedication

Title Page

1: No Good Time to Lose a Wife

2: Day One

3: An Epiphanic Flood

4: Neglected Nostalgia

5: Speed

6: Plan A

7: The Fixers

8: Hawking

9: Fixers Can Be Female

10: Plan C

11: The Meaning of Lasagna

12: Football

13: Library Science

14: A Woman with Pull

15: The History of Time According to Selraybob

16: Conspiracy in the Craw

17: Road Trip to the Source of Time

18: Welcome to NIST

19: The Bowels of Time

20: Dangling

21: The Coming of the Female Fixer

22: The Seductive Effects of Time Theory

23: Maybe I Was Wrong

Appendix: Favorite Words from the Dictionary of Science